watermelon pucker, wanel, and weigh ins

I just wanna get drunk, hide somewhere in the midst of a forrest, fall asleep and never wake up

some pants I ordered several months ago from wanelo came in today.
they're to big. how? I'm big


i have a weigh in tomorrow
I love the look on their face when they tell me I've dropped weight, no matter if it's pounds or ounces.


i always pig out the day before weigh ins if only to cheat it a bit.
three different smoothies.
vanilla shredder. (180)
green life (120)
lean chocolate (245)

not that that's much to the normal eye. whatever.
i feel so full and disgusting
(545)
(five hundred and forty five)
(fatassfatassfatassfatassfattt)
that number is so close to 600.
i eat 600 calories in three days. not one.
whatever.
anyways, im getting so anxious about food again that im starting to be freaked out by even gas station coffee because im not 100% sure what calories are in it.
it's disgusting how much i wanna die. whatever.