Q: what are your lowest weights during points of being in the hospital?
A: first time was 82, then 86, then 84, then 92.
Q: what does a normal day look like for you without an eating plan, just doing you
A: in between five and eight cups of coffee, two or three un sweet hot green teas and some broth. (: And maybe half an apple with cinnomen.
Q: how are you managing to maintain A boyfriend and an eating disorder. I feel like my eating disorder is my boyfriend..
A: I have no idea. I've always been really good at not letting different parts of my life collide. So for instance I don't involve my school life with my home life or my home life with my sport life or my sport life with my social life. So I guess I just try not to put my eating disorder and my boyfriend under the same roof. I hide a lot, put on a thousand masked smiles and deal.
Q: surely people know when you're relapsing, how do you react to their reactions? I'm very bad about my temper.
A: reaction? I don't normally give them one. And my reasoning being becaus people flatter themselves tooooo much and are too self centered so if I gave them a reaction they might try to do something like relate my disorder to themselves. If they get no reaction, they have no fuel for their fire because I just pissed on it.
Q: have you been diagnosed with anything else other than anorexia?
A: depression, anxiety, and severe imsomnia .
Q: Did you ever think that maybe if you just smoked some weed, you'd get munchies and it'd cure you not eating.
A: hey Dick face. I smoke weed . On the regular. Good, medical shit. and not once have I been hungry after. You can go shove your theory up your ass anytime now.
Q: if your so under weight why don't you just eat?
A: *throws middle finger up* AND THIS ONE IS TO THE PEOPLE WHO DONT KNOW A DAMN THING. ignorant shits <3
Q: what symptoms did you personally fall under when being diagnosed and did you get any medical complications along with it. I want to be thin thin thin but no medical complications along with it.
A: I held the signs when being diagnosed that I was under bmi by too much.
Excessive concern about weight and body shape
Unexpected weight loss
Secretive eating or discovery that food is missing
Loss of menstrual cycles
Evidence of laxative abuse
Food group avoidance
Skipping meals
Avoiding eating in front of others
WHAT KIND OF MEDICAL COMPLICATIONS
Menstrual irregularities or loss of periods which can result in the inability to have children
Growth of facial hair
Weakening of the heart and other organs due to malnourishment Dehydration
impaired kidney functions
Lowered resistance to infection
Loss of muscle tissue
Dehydration-altered brain function and size
Dizziness, weakness or fainting Chest pain, shortness of breath
Depression and anxiety
Brittle hair and nails Sleep disturbance and fatigue
Severe dental problems including loss of teeth and bone
Close Death experiences.
Q: do you have any advice for people battleing ALL types of eating disorders?
A: you all are so beautiful, so strong, and so powerful. It takes someone unbelievably strong to live through what we do everyday and I just wanted to let you all know that I'm here for you.
I'm not going to give you a bullshit answer like pick up that fork, put away your toothbrush, don't work out, or stop over eating cause that just isn't fair and I know first hand that that's not how it works.
I'm also not going to tell you to recover.
You have to want recovery for there to even be like A 30% chance that you won't relapse, or else it will do nothing but make things worse.
So if you're looking into recovery, just know, you have to want it first.
And for the rest of you who maybe don't want recovery or are like me and relapsing down the shit hole, stay safe. I love you Guys.
<3
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